Better get a cup of tea and a chair, it’s a long one 😉
Been a lovely day today, which is a huge improvement on the rest of the week. Well, it was OK when Mimi was round the other day, the smalls were no trouble, but Big and I are going through one of our customary not-really-getting-each-other phases. Tiring, very tiring. Given that one of, if not the, primary reason for home educating our children is because we want them to be happy, it’s hard to be in a house with my five year old daughter telling me that she wishes she didn’t have a mummy. 🙁
Anyway, the reading is coming along. Each day we’ve done a little, she’s read another Winnie book to me. Refusing to get into a battle over it and withdrawing every time it gets silly has taken a lot of the heat out of the situation, although it was a deep sigh today when she brought The Magic Porridge Pot over and said she wanted to read it. As we were expecting visitors imminently though, I said we could only do a page, and then we had to get on with excavating and hoovering. (Really must invite ppl here for the first time more often, it’s so good for the house! 😉 ) So we set to, and she did really well. It had some words on that we haven’t really covered the rules for (flying by the seat of my pants now, I’ve no idea what to do, she wants to read, I’m following…) so I just explained them, and it probably only took about 5 minutes. She was happy, I’m happy. 🙂
We got the house excavated and the living room and kitchen hoovered (I am such a slob!) before the Beans arrived. SB and Big seemed to pretty much have a great time – very occasional strops back into the living room on Big’s part, but tbh, they haven’t really spent all that much time together, and I thought they did really well. Small admired BB, he really does love babies. I’ve got piccies, but I don’t have the energy to deal with them tonight, so you’ll have to wait til tomorrow.
Helen and I got to sit and chat and drink tea, which was rather pleasant. The girls came and went, and watched a little tv here and there, played with geomags (tick maths and science), and had stories read by Helen, and Small pottered with his jigaws. They left as we started to get ready for ballet. Now, why does this take such an effort? I remind her of what she needs to take. I tell her where it is. I give her plenty of time to find everything. But we still have to have a song and dance over it all (appropriately enough 😉 ) and so on and so forth. Somehow we scrambled out of the door on time though, although she didn’t put the comb in the bag, but back in her room (???) so her bun wasn’t the neatest ever. Left Small at home with Tim and took my crochet with me, which was actually rather pleasant. There’s a woman there who usually sits somewhere out of the way quietly, and always speaks to Small, and today she went to sit in the boys’ changing room (there are no boy students), so I joined her, and it was a very comfortable space, not the chairs, the atmosphere, iykwim.
Home via the coop for milk and bits – Big saw a cottage pie and wanted to buy one, but instead I saw Quorn mince on offer, so we grabbed a couple of packs of that and I sent her back to get an onion (see Jamie Oliver, my child knows what an onion looks like!) and said that we’d make our own tomorrow. She’s really looking forward to that – must keep to that plan.
And the pondering. Hm. I’ve been wondering about the best way to progress with this education thing. For ages I wanted to be completely autonomous, and child led, and sat here waiting for Big to lead me somewhere. I littered the place with resources, provided sporadic activities, took her to groups, on outings and waited. Nothing. I got more resources, science magazines, more books (*so* many more books!), found class tv, little toe radio, websites, computer games….and still got nowhere really.
So then I decided that maybe she needed to learn some stuff before she could develop a real interest. And she wanted to learn to read. So we’ve tried a variety of different tacks there, and something seems to be working – I think she’s getting the hang of it. And we’re doing some maths as well, and not terribly basic stuff.
But it’s been rather stressful – not unlike the ballet. When I ask her to get ready she’ll go into a major strop and run around panicking, including saying that she never wants to go again. 🙁 If I say, OK, we won’t go, I get a really distraught little girl, desperate to go. Aargh! Make up your mind! And very much the same with reading, with maths, with pretty much anything.
Then Merry said something the other night, that really stuck. Charlotte Mason derived/ inspired? “yes do some reading and writing but then escort them to china for the afternoon on the wings of your skills not theirs” and so I’ve been trying to work out what that would mean for me and mine. For all I love books, I don’t really like reading out loud (I don’t like my own voice, and have some self consciousness over the fact that I sometimes get words wrong, hangover from the deaf issues), but I think that that is something I’m going to have to grit my teeth and get over. And Big is creative – as is Small – which is something I really want to encourage, but I don’t think of myself as particularly creative. So I’ve been trying to think of things that I can do, that would also fit in with Big’s needs to be more involved in our lives and work. I’m pondering web design – wondering if there’s some way I can get her to do the design which I could then produce. She likes pink – anyone want a pink blog?
Anyway, it’s very late, we’re having bad sleep at the moment, and I’m probably not making a great deal of sense. I’ve made a few notes on things I want to blog in more detail about the previous few days, but I’ll get to those tomorrow.
G’night all.
Comments
12 responses to “Ticking the boxes, and pondering.”
*SHE* could have a pink blog! Then when she reads books you/she can type about them together, when you do projects you can photograph bits for her, and she can have ownership of it? Should be relatively easy to do web design together, especially with a stylesheet – make up a boring blankish one and tell her she can change any colours, text sizes, etc. What links would she like in her sidebar, that sort of thing …?
DO identify with the waiting to be led thing – unfortunately I’m such a control freak that I couldn’t wait long enough, same here, the leading wasn’t happening – other than to the tv remote, obviously. Glad to hear someone else who finds reading out loud difficult too, thought it was only me.
wrt the reading, did you see the study dog link? not sure if it would appeal to Big but maybe worth a try.
Anyway keep pondering and blogging, hope you had a good night’s sleep 🙂
Remember that because Big has had a loving mum and dad always there, she really has no idea what she’s saying when she says she doesn’t want a mum. Actually you’re such an enormous part of who she is that she can’t really fathom what she’s saying- she’s just testing the emotional landscape. It’s a *phase* and NO reflection on you at all.
If it’s any consolation Pip seldom organises herself for clubs etc and she’s 7!!!
Sb went through a reasonably long phase of not letting me put her to bed/ hug her when she cried etc, telling me she loved daddy ‘much much more’. Culminated at Melrose [so a bit stressful at times] and now definitely waning. After getting totaly distraught about it, I told her I loved her very much, and it didn’t matter who she loved the most. We also resolutely alternated the bedtimes. When I started gritting teeth and ignoring the love daddy more bit, it started to disappear, and we are back on a much more even keel. [sometimes a bit wobbly though] Think it is just a control thing!
on the reading aloud, I do actually enjoy it, but you must have noticed me fluffing it a fair bit. SB often corrects me on stories we know well, and we just laugh about mouths getting in a tangle.
We did have a great time, and I especially liked the intertwined circles on the crochet – or was it a mobius strip??
Looking forward to seeing piccies.
I’ve noticed with my 4 (not so much the older ones now but Lyddie’s starting with it) that they’ll sometimes say and do anything just to try to get a reaction. It’s obviously a vital part of growing up, testing their power, or something. I don’t really understand it.
Your ponderings are very interesting. As you know I had to deschool T, A & Z which naturally led onto autonomy, but it’ll be different with Lyddie. I don’t know whether she will always be motivated to do stuff, or whether I’ll be desperate for some structure for her in a few years! I think the thing is to find what makes you all happy (or as close to that as you can get) & do it, isn’t it? Whatever seems appropriate at the time.
Mmmmmm…. Fran has JUST got to an age where she can get her dancing stuff together and i still have to do “face wash, hair brush, shoes on, coat on” about 10 times! Don’t expect too much. We get next weeks bag ready after class, then its done.
(((Jax))))
I have “got over” hating reading out loud. It did take a while though so I know just how you feel. Start with easy books??
Ok, so I’m weird – I love reading aloud. What infuriates me though is the apparent total lack of attention being paid. Feet kicked against sofa, humming of toneless tunes, sudden interest in unidentifiable mark on arm of chair etc etc. But if I stop reading, there’s a mini-riot.
And I completely understand the wanting to do autonomous – but I caved in and got a few bits of Sonlight and suddenly we seem to be getting somewhere. D actually asked to do some ‘work’ the other day. Maybe once we’re up to speed on reading and writing and computer-literacy I can relax and let a bit more self-led learning creep in, but for now, I’m rather firmly ‘guiding’. 🙂 {{{hugs}}}
I think the web design idea sounds inspired – something you can both get excited over, and you can pass on what you do work wise. It could be a blog or a website with a blog page and she can put up whatever she wants. Though I wonder if there might be temptation to get very frustrated with Big’s speed and have urges to just do it yourself – or maybe that’s just what I would be like! LOL
Mark does the running round in a panic thing getting his stuff together and he’s a fair bit older than Big, she’s not unusual! It’s a slow process but it gets easier. I’m trying a new routine of him having a list on the wall next to where he keeps his coat of what he needs for each activity and he collects one thing at a time and puts it by the door. Then I can just keep reminding him to keep getting stuff til he’s got it all (only 2 or 3 things per activity) – less instructions from me to forget, and less me feeling blimey, why can’t he just get his things together? It would be working even better if I was more consistent in using it, but… I think just learning to get your stuff organised takes a while, and its going to be easier here to make it a very specific routine til he’s completely got the hang of it. Would something along those lines work for Big?
Enjoy the cooking together today!
I’m sure Fran would like a pink blog :~)
hey – codeplacidykids.co.uk :~D
Actually – that’s a bloody marvellous idea – Jax, there’s your niche – a HE kids html tutorial site :~)
You know what, Jax – I can see myself in Big. I’m hopeless at getting out of the house too, and get distracted when trying to get ready for just about everything. Maybe it really isn’t something as easy and obvious as those who can do it would have us believe. I think my most spectacular example was Kessingland least year. We were aiming to leave by 10am and finally crawled out of the house at 5pm.
I only get my lot out by doing a boot camp instructor impression. Max is useless at it!