Earlier this week, I indulged myself in a small spending spree in a charity shop. I bought 5 dinosaurs, and 2 items of baby clothing that would fit a doll. I put all of this stuff into one plastic bag, and on thursday night, on the way home from school, put the bag between the children and told them there were presents in it for them.
Small claimed the dinosaurs – Big handed them to him, and she took the doll’s clothes. He does have a doll, but doesn’t appear to register the fact, and I daresay she has had dinosaurs, but they are uninteresting to her. So despite exposure to all types of toys, they have strongly gender typed themselves. Dunno whether that is interesting or not – suspect it is, but not really sure how.
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7 responses to “gender typing”
I tried the stereotyping thing with small person when she was little. She always chose a mixture of girls’ and boys’ toys: dolls, Brio train set etc are just a couple of examples. She didn’t begin to choose more ‘girlie’ goods until she was older (but for the life of me I can’t remember what age).
When my brother and I were kids, we had typically stereotyped toys – he corgi cars, scalextric (sp?), marbles, models and I dolls, pram and cot, dolls tea set etc. He played with my dolls more than I did whereas I adored the marbles and scalextric. The most fun we had was with my dad’s Hornby 001 railway set 😀
I think if you let them choose whatever they want, it will be the item that reflects any given moment of their lives. I also believe that to a certain extent, we are pre-programmed in a particular way. Having said that, I still prefer boys’ toys by far but then again, I never really was terribly girlie.
A friend’s little boy likes to dress up and where his Mum’s shoes!
I have a big brother, so when I was a kid I often played with his toys too… cars etc, but we shared the Lego (my fave).
Hmmm, I may be an evil ‘choice feminist’ and not a proper one because I haven’t got a job, but even I know that the answer to that is: well, seeing as they haven’t grown up in a vacuum, or a cupboard, that they haven’t gender-typed *themselves* at all 😉
J used to like pink when he was younger, and had a pink long-sleeved T shirt with a sparkly J on it which was one of his favourites. Soon got that knocked out of him at school 🙁 (Nothing physical, just lots of peer pressure I expect.)
Yes it is interesting 😉 I try not to impose gender stereotyping on my kids- they all have access to a wide variety of toys, although they often tend to veer towards certain types of things when they get a bit older. Freddie (not yet 3) seems to be the only one immune to this and seems to love all toys equally. I’m not sure where the toy- preference comes from. I think well I’m at least giving them the opportunity to try everything and I do intervene if the older ones make any comments, like ‘that’s girly’, or whatever. I get fed up when other people seem to be constantly imposing their gender stuff on them- grandparents commenting on the length of boys’ hair, total strangers mistaking boys for girls and making an issue out of it, other people’s children making judgements on what my children would like: girl cousin: ‘I’ve got some trucks Freddie would like to play with’ (these all happened in the last week). Not that I don’t believe that boys and girls have their differences, I just don’t think it should be imposed on them. I suppose having 2 boys and 2 girls i am in an ideal position to observe the differences 🙂 but mainly they are just 4 different people as far as I can make out so far. They are different when they grow up, obviously, but some people seem to be in too much of a hurry to emphasise this, so kids can miss out on certain types of play.
Incidentally, Steiner reckoned that playing with dolls is vital for all young children- its not just about looking after babies, but its about role- play, etc, playing out things that have happened to help them understand.
Anyway, I ramble…
Well, I very deliberately NEVER dressed dd up all pink and girlie as a tot and yet it has to be said that it’s a rare thing now for her not to be wearing something either pink or purple and she is mad on anything to do with fairies or princesses….. sigh…. I suspect it’s divine retribution for me being a tomboy despite mum’s best efforts…. 😀
I always remember that story of the little boy who lost his penis in a circumcision accident when he was fairly new-born. His parents were told by their consultant to raise the child as a girl. He never felt right, and returned to male identity at some stage later in life.