First swimming lesson of the new year.
Oh come on, you know how it went 🙁
So we were out nice and early (once the swimming teacher managed to get her out of the pool, given that I couldn’t with screaming limpet boy attached to me too 🙁 ) and I brought her home before taking him back to the library with me. He mostly enjoyed it, although he did have a very loud tantrum when it was time to leave.
So now, how to change from all of this? For the first time ever, school is on the cards as a possibility. I think it would be horrendous, and we would get a very unpleasant small child back in the evening, but at least we’d have quieter days. There, that’s got to be the worst reason for considering sending a child to school you’ve ever come across eh?
Anyway, I’ve got loads on this weekend, so I’m going to get on with that, and then Monday morning, we’re going to start with structured stuff. I believe in autonomous education, but right at the moment, it isn’t working for us. I *hate* the idea that I’m going to have to come up with stuff to do all the time, but I can’t see another way forward right now – probably too close to it all tbh.
Suggestions in the usual place please.
Comments
10 responses to “Fiascos are us.”
oh (((jax))) hugs for you. our swimming doesn’t start until next week. Don’t know what I can say that you don’t know already (nothing, probably) but hope you can hang on in there.
Jax that certainly isn’t the worst reason for sending a child to school and I have used it on more than one occasion as a threat to small person! However I would agree that you would have an awful small child return from school at the end of the day.
As to the autonomous v structured approach. It works differently for each child and I am guessing that Big and Small are quite the opposite. I suspect that Big would like to have more structure as she is an intelligent young lady who likes to stretch her mind. I also think she might work well under pressure so to speak; some kids don’t do well when there is no set time limit (my nephews being 2 such peeps). Having structure though doesn’t necessarily mean you will have to sit with her constantly. I have to say that I really enjoyed writing a maths programme for small person: I had to think carefully about the way *she* thinks, thus putting a bit more effort into it than I perhaps would have done otherwise. And yes it took me several nights but on the plus side, she understood everything first time which was amazing. Very satisfying for me too 🙂
I know you have mentioned how much you hate the TV but in its defense, small person has learnt so much from watching all kinds of programmes – from complete drivel to adult documentaries – that I have let her choose what she watches and when. And yes, it is not a good idea to use the TV as a babysitter, but it does mean that you have the chance to get on with other things whilst the littlies are occupied.
Only my humble opinions, ignore at will 😉
Every so often I tighten our belts so to speak and bring a structure to our days ( we are in it right now). I find it quite exhausting which is why I am giving Ambleside a bash as they kindly break it down week by week for you! I nevr stick to the structure as we naturally come ut of it but as soon as I start to feel out of control or the kids are acting out of control I bring it back. We are all very grateful for the security it offers. Even Buzz has always has his sit down time doing something structured such as bricks, puzzles, colouring and now he does have some work books. Our dreams and the realities often vary, sometimes for always sometimes for short periods. I do make them sit on their own whist I work in the kitchen or say clean the lounge but they have to be at the table working. Every now and then I sit down. Sometimes I will sit and kit,read, sew or do my own paperwork at the same table.
xxxxxxx
Owning up to the fact that school is a threatened punishment here at least once a fortnight too if it helps at all 🙂
Davies is actually very good at being quite self entertaining – he has his moments of course, but I can easily go for hours each day without having to do much with him really.
You were going to have a sit down chat with her about now weren’t you deciding what she wanted to do this coming year? How about she gives you some ideas of projects (themes like space, dinosaur, human body are ones we have debated of late here) or some actual goals like ‘read a certain book’ (works for Katy 🙂 ) or ‘do this maths workbook’ so you have a variety of ideas, then offer a choice of activities to do each morning or whenever she needs occupying.
Don’t know how well this would work for you or Big, or whether I’m making sense, but I often give Davies a bit of direction on something then let him make the choice where to run with it – so sort of automomous, but with me behind the scenes. (e.g he tells me he wants to do dinosaurs so we have on offer playdough to make them from, some books to try and read about them, a jigsaw puzzle featuring them, a cd rom / online game related to them, some worksheets on maths / english but dinosaur themed, some baking dino cookies, colouring in pictures of dinos and so on – oh and the leappad book on them too. All stuff we have lying around anyway but he feels he is getting a big choice of what to do, is learning something too and I feel better)
(((hugs))) from me Jax, seems like we are thinking along similar sort of lines regarding introducing some sort of structure. I had no idea that a more structured approach would work if I’m honest after the children have had so many ‘lazy days’ but it has. They do still get a choice of what to do though, nothing is forced upon them and they can choose to leave to watch tv or play at anytime. As yet they haven’t, but I’m sure the novelty of ‘all this learning’ will soon wear off, for Joseph at least. Chelsea on the other hand would demand more if she could!
One thing I’m going to try is a little more structure – hence the word tree. and if your email addy would stop bouncing my emails, you might get the templates through at some point today. 🙂
As for threatening school… been there, done that and she’s only been out half a term. lol
(((((hugs)))))
(((Jax))) KWYM with the small talking thing but it will happen sooner rather than later. I think we will have to have a group ((())) mentally if not physically at Melrose and share ideas on various structural things to try because I think we may need to start this as LC is all over the place 5 mins here 8 mins there etc.
More hugs (((Jax)))we are “back to” structure Monday after a month unstructured. I think some children like a bit of both. I notice wonderful things happening while we are being autonomous but after awhile the kids get antsy for something different. I try to follow their lead at this point, now we’ve been at it several years. When they get to arguing and possibly even saying “I’m bored” time to be structured for awhile again :-). All this to say you don’t have to be just autonomous or just structured a bit of both can work just fine too! Also totaly agreeing with asking what they want to do/learn this year. That has worked really well for my eldest who is my child who prefers the least structured approach.
I may just be being picky, but the dichotomy is not actually between autonomous and structured, y’all 🙂
Jax, Big clearly enjoys it and gets an awful lot of out when the two of you do stuff together, so how on earth could doing more of that NOT be autonomous?
Structure, to my mind, is a purely practical, organisational thing – whether it’s organising a curriculum, or just organising your time. If it makes your days happier for you both to know roughly what’s going to happen when, that’s a Good Thing. E.g. when you were blogging about doing the JP regularly, you both seemed to enjoy that, but you haven’t mentioned it for a while?
I know that for me with 4 of them, there’s no way it would be physically possible for me to at any given moment be following up all my children’s interests. So I’m trying – with their cooperation – to carve out chunks of time whereby each child will eventually know that that’s their time – I’m slowly starting to get my head round the really *really* long-term nature of this, and these habits …. Anyway, however structured that timetable gets, it’ll still be autonomous!
And I don’t think one needs structure to stretch one’s mind either 🙂
I agree completely with this not being about structure v autonomous. If a child needs/wants structure, than providing that is providing an autonomous environment, IMO. My own view is that structure is only not autonomous when it is something imposed on a child without their consent. If that makes sense. Alison- you made me smile with your comment about the really, really long term nature of this. While I’ve only got the one to consider, set against my own age, I’ve had a dawning realisation recently about this being for the long term. I think I only let it seep into my conciousness in very minute segments, otherwise I’d just freak out 🙂