It's that time of year

Jun 8, 2011

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when a lot of us feel out of step with the blogging world again.

I’m not alone in feeling that I’m a little out of step. It’s ranking week (when the new Wikio and tots100 lists are out) – and ppl feel left out or elated or swept up or left out, and no matter how much we tell each other we’re not in it for the metrics, if the metrics aren’t smiling on us, we’re a little bit hurt. Because we are doing this to be read. If you don’t want to be read, you don’t publish a blog. You write a journal, or you have a password protected site. If it’s a blog on the internet you are wanting someone to read it, even if it’s only three ppl you know and love, and for most of us, that isn’t quite enough.

So we confess it, we like to be read. And we probably do things to improve our chances of being read. I attended an SEO webinar today with 37 other ppl, mainly who were there to learn I think, and although I didn’t learn anything new in terms of SEO, I learnt a lot about bloggers, and ppl generally.

The other feature to this part of the year is Cybermummy. It’s coming up fast, it’s majorly hyped, it’s where bloggers will meet bloggers and brands and hope to make contacts to find things to write about. Yes, ppl are probably hoping for freebies after the amount of chat about the swag last year, but that wasn’t what took me there last year, and it’s not what is motivating me to go this year.

I want to make connections. I want to make friends. I want to spend time with other ppl who understand how important putting these words on a page day after day and sending them out into cyberspace is. How important it is to be read, to be discussed, to be linked to, to be commented on. To other ppl who understand that no matter how we protest we don’t care about nominations or not nominations (yes, it’s award season too) it isn’t happy making to be left out.

I’m not sure how I’m going to make it to cybermummy. Despite having known for months that I’m going (sponsored by the lovely Photobox, more of that very soon) I still haven’t quite sorted out the finer details of childcare arrangements for three children with very different needs. Smallest still needs me during the day, though less and less now, and I’m not sure how to achieve being there for her and being at a blog conference without her. It’s tough being attached in a detached world. Big needs to be at a guide sleepover, and Small just needs someone to run tech support and check he’s fed regularly 😉 so between them, they do require some parental input.

But I’ll figure it out, and I’ll be there. I’ll be the slightly shy one in a corner, probably with a smartphone, hoping against hope that I recognise ppl I’ve met before and put together names and blognames from those I only know online. I’m really bad at it, so if I don’t say hi, don’t assume I’m blanking you, assume I’m just not sure I know for sure who you are, and say hi anyway, please?

And now I’m going to go off and optimise the pages I’d like to be found. The book reviews, the products that have been sent. But posts like this one? I don’t know how to optimise them. What are the keywords for rambling post about lack of confidence and life?

cybermummy It’s where it is life seo Wikio

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Comments

17 responses to “It's that time of year”

Susan Mann
8 June 2011
Big hugs I know exactly how you feel and when I see you at cybermummy hiding in the corner or not I’m giving you a big hug. I promise. xxx
Reply
1. Jax
  8 June 2011
  Looking forward to seeing you too.
  Reply
Alexander Residence
8 June 2011
I like the way our paths crossed again this week at the seminar. Laughed at your point about keywords. Some of my posts are just unpigeonholeable. Have just inserted ‘running’ into every paragraph of my last post though, that was easy!
Thanks for the perspective, all the hype is draining me and exciting me in equal measure. Will def look out for you.
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1. Jax
  8 June 2011
  Lots of my posts are just the wrong shape for keyword holes I think, but that’s just the way it is. Do need to work on promoting the more focussed ones. But I can’t help feeling that Dooce never optimised her blog…
  oh, and yes, good to run into you again at the seminar. Seems we are destined to get to know each other now 🙂
  Reply
Sarah
8 June 2011
s’funny, I used to be bothered about having a ‘popular’ blog but now I totally am not. Doing it for the few people I know and love is the only reason I carry on.
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1. Jax
  8 June 2011
  And I remember when you wore that fab T shirt too…our blogs mirror and echo our lives, or sometimes they replace bits we’re missing in other ways. When I was working full time the blog suffered, now it’s a large part of my connections and may even form some kind of bridge into an alternate career for me. But it’s not without its own heartache trying to balance it all.
  Reply
Helen
8 June 2011
If I can help getting kids to various places give me a shout!
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1. Jax
  8 June 2011
  Thanks Helen, will bear that in mind 🙂
  Reply
Julia
9 June 2011
When you’ve found the answer to your last question, do pass it along. I’ve no idea either! 😉
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1. Jax
  9 June 2011
  Sadly I don’t think there are any. Is that sad? Perhaps not, as it implies no one would be searching for them.
  Reply
Linda
9 June 2011
I really hope that CM this year is worthwhile for you, there will be a lot of people going who feel the same as you, I hope you can find some kindred spirits. On the subject of metrics, charts, being read, being influential, heartache caused by blogging, I think it’s a real shame that such an eloquent and engaging blogger as you should feel out of sorts because of this sort of thing. I’m thinking of writing a post called ‘how to measure influence’ (partly because I couldn’t influence my children to leave the house on time this morning) it would be about two lines long and say something about the fact that people read is enough. Good luck – and hugs. xx
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1. Jax
  9 June 2011
  I think we all have these moments, and the more of ourselves we put out there, the more we open ourselves to it perhaps?
  I am looking forward to CM on some levels, as I know that there will be some ppl there that I already know and others that I’ve got to know well on twitter/ blogs and am looking forward to meeting. But I’m worried that I may become my usual tongue tied self and not manage to even say hello to some ppl – iirc last year was somewhat chaotic and it was easy to miss ppl even when you were looking for them.
  Reply
Sally
9 June 2011
Hi Jax,
It’s an interesting one.
As you know, I run an index, and I run an awards programme. I do the best job I know how to do, and I try and balance the competitive elements of those things with non-competitive and non-commercial activities. Overall, I hope the balance is right, but it’s an ongoing process.
I think that, as women, we often put pressure on ourselves to achieve success. I don’t think charts bring angst – I think we bring it ourselves.
In the same way we protest that stats don’t matter and then feel deflated when we score poorly, we protest that we’re not ambitious for our kids and feel disappointed when they aren’t top of the class. We say we care about what’s inside more than what’s outside, but we feel upset when we step on the scales. We work to live and not live to work, but we strive after that promotion and feel a failure when we don’t achieve that.
I think to an extent, happiness lies in accepting that sometimes you’ll have high expectations of yourself, even when it doesn’t really matter. That it’s okay to be disappointed when you don’t live up to them, but you keep it in perspective, pick yourself and move on.
I’m sure there are some people out there who really don’t worry about anything more than being happy, but I’m not one of them, I must confess. If anyone knows the secret, I’d love to hear it.
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1. Jax
  9 June 2011
  I had a friend at school who never seemed to worry about anything particularly. She did what she was comfortable doing, and had a flagrant lack of regard for popularity or scores. Made her very difficult for anyone to bully and I was very grateful for years and years of her friendship. I never did work out how she did it though.
  Reply
Sian – MummyTips
9 June 2011
Jax,
Sally’s right we do set our own expectations, which is of course why we hardly ever live up to them.
Blogging is a strange old thing. It’s an insular pursuit yet a social extreme. We share our inner most thoughts in such a candid manner yet turn into shy, bashful creatures when put together in a room.
I’d say that your reservations are shared with the majority of people coming to CyberMummy – or any other blogger event for that matter and I hope that you ditch the hype and just have a good time with new friends and old.
See you soon.
Sian
As bloggers we sit behind the safety of our screens whilst comfortably sharing our inner most thoughts with whoever stops by for a read.
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Jenny Paulin
11 June 2011
Great post!! I too have been offered opportunity now at last minute to attend Cybermummy and I really want to go but logistics of getting there from Devon with , by then, 3 month old, is making me wonder if I should. Hope u get your Childcare sorted 🙂
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1. Jax
  12 June 2011
  Travelling with a baby is tough, I did it last year with a wrap. Much easier than buggy on public transport.
  Reply