I’m pretty sure I’ll have talked on this site before about rhythms, and routines, but probably not that much about rituals. That’s because up until this week, they haven’t been a large part of my life. But on Thursday afternoon, browsing the library while Smallest was at art club, I came across Theresa Cheung: 21 Rituals to change your life.
(Also available at Amazon affiliate both new and secondhand.)
As I usually do with non fiction, I scanned the first few pages right there in the library. It was this paragraph in the introduction that made me borrow it.
Most of us have absolutely no idea that what we repeatedly do creates our everyday experience. We think our future is shaped by big events, decisions we make, thoughts we have, and opinions of others, but this book will show that it is your daily actions that are the golden key. Pay close attention to what you actually do every day, and see your life transform.
I’ve come across the various types of self help guide that say all you need is affirmations. Instagram accounts that earnestly tell you all you need to do is chant “I do not chase, I attract. What is meant for me will simply find me.”
Hm. I’m really not quite sure how that is supposed to work.
But the rituals book, while having an undercurrent of what I would call ‘woo’, also has a good strand of practicality. And I’m open to the idea that if you line everything up with your intentions and actions, it makes it easier for the universe to give you a helping hand 😉
I brought the book home, and as I often do, shared pics on insta (and therefore other social media). And was really surprised that it seemed to chime with a few people, several of whom decided they would try to get hold of the book and join in.
I’ve started a facebook group so that we can work together to support each other, it’s here if you want a look. And I’m working gradually to build the rituals into my day – some are easier than others!
The morning batch are a good way to start the day.
- wake up earlier
- Stretch instead of reaching for your phone
- Ask yourself one simple question
- Just breathe
- Smile in the mirror
- See the finish line
- Tune in
By earlier, I’m going for anything before 10.30. (Yeah, I know, not exactly early, but one small step at a time.)
The stretch instead of reaching for your phone is really good. It completely changes my focus on the day.
My sticking point at the moment is the one simple question, because every time I see this prompt, I go all Dirty Harry, and that’s not quite where we’re supposed to be coming from. The book suggests Steve Jobs – If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I’m about to do today? – but I don’t find this a very practical or inspiring way to think about things.
No, I wouldn’t want to spend the last day of my life washing up and wrangling a 9 year old through some maths questions.
But at the same time, looking after my family and spending time with my children? Not so bad.
All about framing.
But I’m still working on the question.
Thoughts?
The morning rituals sound good.
My phone is my alarm clock but I have to stretch to reach it to turn it off, so I guess that counts?
I wake up at 7am to make sure eldest is getting up so that’s pretty early already.
My question is always “what day is it, how soon do I have to get up?” as it varies according to work or volunteering.
With the phone as alarm clock it’s whether you then pick it up and dive into the abyss or whether you sit up, finish doing some stretching and wake up. The suggestion is that the rituals are put together to lead to waking with intention 🙂 the question is designed the same way, and I think I’m getting to the bottom of my discomfort with it.
This is really interesting. I have bought the book using your amazon link and will look forward to joining you in the new year. Thank you xxx
You are doing well and are being very inspiring. I am struggling to get passed not going on my phone. I find I start the cleaning earlier and then feel more negative that I haven’t made some time for myself. Especially as everyone else is sleeping and then going on their phone. Earlier – ugh I get up at 6:30-7. Mind if I could make the earlier spin (6:30) class I may feel like I have time for me.
I’m taking earlier to mean that I set an alarm/ get up when I wake up. Rather than just sleeping until whenever. So I’m definitely tweaking the rituals to be whatever works to make me feel better about myself/ my day and absolutely not following anything that just feels like a way to beat myself up. I think way too many new routines/ change your lives very quickly deteriorate into just a way to feel like a failure and I’m done with that.