In the early days of a new baby you don’t expect sleep. You hope for it, but you don’t expect it. Or at least, I don’t. I’ve never had a child that’s been what you’d call a good sleeper. I think small was for a few weeks, but then deteriorated and didn’t sleep through til he was 18 months.
Tigerboy is taking this to extremes. I timed him last night. From a two breast feed, deeply asleep to wide awake 8 minutes after he was put down. Basically he wants to sleep in my arms, although he will accept the car seat our the sling. None of these things are a solution for me getting any rest at night.
Today it reached a peak. He had a crying fit at lunchtime and nothing I could do stopped it. I ended up putting him in the sleep bit of his bounce and sleep and running out to cry in the bathroom while Big took over and he eventually calmed down.
So I’m exploring solutions. I’m going to ring our osteopath and ask her about cranial osteopathy in case there is some tension in his head or neck that is giving him problems. The ever helpful Daddynatal sent me a link to a video on safe swaddling that I’m considering, wondering if that will help. And if I had a couple of hundred pounds spare and somewhere to put it I’d be very tempted by a baby nest or hammock, as I’ve heard good things about them too. Basically I’m at the try anything stage, too exhausted to do anything though.
Anyone got any miracle solutions for me?
antoinette . (@divasupermum) says
oh bless, lots of hugs go out to you, swaddling, might help the baby and you, just try everything
Carol says
No miracle solutions sorry 🙁
But I know I did it, and we made it to 8mth somehow, and now things are mostly better (except for last night *sigh*)
We got one of those rocking baby swings from freecycle which helped a bit, I think I know the hammock you are on about, we were lent one which L hated but did look on ebay for around £30-40. DH and big kids took turns with walking with him whilst I slept. I would drive and sit in the car with the engine running to keep him asleep. I would walk with him in the sling for hours just to get him sleeping. Swaddling is recommended so its worth a try. He would sleep if I held him so we would nap sitting upright with him on my chest, or he would sleep on my lap.
Im sure others will have lots of helpful suggestions but wanted to say that I have been there and its hard, but you will get through it. (((((hugs)))))
Tasha Goddard says
Where are you putting him down? With both mine, they had long periods when they would only sleep in bed next to me and then I could sleep while breastfeeding, too, which helped a lot. We also got a routine going with LaLa where she’d get to sleep in the sling (either me or Chris walking her round in the bedroom), then we could manage to do a convoluted lying down on the bed and extracting her from the sling without waking her. But mostly the best thing for us was having her in bed for at least one chunk of the night. Most of her daytime sleep was in the sling – or now and then in the buggy.
That lack of sleep is awful. It’s strange how you can suddenly be extremely grateful for a chunk of three hours’ sleep, too, where before such a small amount would leave you incapable of anything.
Hope you find a way, soon!
Pru says
we went the cranial route for the last two and it was pretty impressive. Hope it works for you too 🙂
Allie says
Younger child here slept in his car seat for the first few months. We didn’t have a car but Thank God for the car seat! We just had it beside our bed. It didn’t give good stretches but better than anything else. What he really wanted was to be held by someone who was sitting up and that is so exhausting. We did several weeks of just doing that in shifts all through the night… It all seems so long ago now and now he’s quite hard to get out of bed. Hang on in there.
We did crack with him at about 13months and did our own sleep regime with him. It involved putting him down awake and leaving the room for two mins before returning. It took two nights and then he settled happily alone from then on. I’d never have done it with a littler baby though. It was driven by desperation as elder child didn’t believe in sleep either. She didn’t sleep though until over three years old and we were just too exhausted to do that any more!
Allie says
BTW, we did the cranial thing and it was pretty pointless. If I had the time again I think I’d have spent the money on DVDs to entertain the toddler…
Lins says
Oh it’s awful isn’t it. I only coped by kicking dh out of the big bed so I could sleep while feeding (and occasionaly roll over for an hour or so with no one attached to me). I tried with dh in the bed but he didn’t sleep well enough and the deal was that he got an uninterrupted nights sleep (if the toddler didn’t wake up that is) and took baby after 6am. Hope you find a way that works for you… x
Lins says
Oh and I bought a 2nd hand swinging hammocky thing that promised all sorts and it didn’t work but I did sell it again on ebay for the same as I bought it so nothing lost there…
mamacrow says
I found the ring sling was a saviour as I could walk them to sleep and then slip them off into the cot or bed – but they were still in the sling, which smelt of me, that seemed to help.
I definitely remember more than one of them going through a phaze of wanting to sleep on my chest. Which is fine, until they got a bit too heavy for my ribs!
I’ve generally found lying down breastfeeding to be easy, which has been another life saver.
I have also been lucky in that I’ve had a very supportive husband and inlaws who have stepped in to take older children to activities and help with housework so I could rest and nap as much as possible, which meant bearing it a lot easier.
ella says
I’m just catching up with your last posts, you really have had a tough time and I’m sure the lack of sleep is not helping you. I sympathise, I remember long nights with my youngest sleeping on my chest, we eventually co-slept quite successfully although I never got much sleep and I remember the desperate need for a few unbroken hours. The only thing I would add to the above comments is making sure that Tigerboy is not sleeping while he is feeding during the day – Edward would often be feeding for long periods and because I was busy homeschooling I didn’t notice that he was actually mostly asleep…