Comments on: Grass outside

By: Allie

Allie — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 15:03:01 +0000

Internal lawns - now that would be an unusual feature.

By: Claire

Claire — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 13:49:12 +0000

Neatly, Tim, not snugly. Get it right

By: Tim

Tim — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 12:44:27 +0000

Snugly, I expect.

By: Jax

Jax — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 10:46:26 +0000

I’m still struggling with how a house nestles…

By: Tim

Tim — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 10:10:21 +0000

Incidentally, never mind the comma, the word “Externally” is redundant anyway. i.e.

“……the property nestles neatly on this pleasant cul-de-sac. Lawned gardens and a double garage further enhance the property.”

By: Tim

Tim — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 10:06:31 +0000

Yes, (comma) but they didn’t.

When I read it the first time it sent my brain into a coma. Briefly, I lost track of reality and seriously tried to work out WTF they were talking about.

Like you say, badly written bollocks.

BTW, I used to try to give readers hints:

“Tastefully decorated” = decoration is full of taste, all of it bad.

By: Raymond

Raymond — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 09:57:21 +0000

For me, the bollocks (sorry, “Estate Agent speak”) makes reading the description more difficult. Not that I really mind the bollocks - it’s badly written bollocks I find irritating.

Maybe we’re being harsh. It’s the Eats shoots and leaves thing. For the want of a comma, they could have put: “Externally, lawned gardens …”.

By: Alison

Alison — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 08:49:01 +0000

Completely agree with your last sentence. Especially with the internet - there are sites you can advertise your house on for much less than an estate agent’s commission, aren’t there? I think we’d probably try doing that if/when we move again.

By: Claire

Claire — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 08:10:52 +0000

No Alison, not trying to defend gibberish The description that Tim has quoted is absolute b*****ks quite honestly but I was merely illustrating the difficulty of trying to describe hundreds of very similar houses. I’m all for the Campaign for Real English when it comes to selling something (not just houses) because I think that most ppl are fed up with marketing speak.

What sells houses is the price and area first, then photos, then accommodation. If those seem ok on the details, folks will drive past; if externally it looks well kempt, ppl will want to go in. Quite honestly, most people could quite easily sell their own homes themselves, without the need for an estate agent, given some basic guidelines and probably do a better job for a fraction of the price.

By: Tim

Tim — Thu, 29 Mar 2007 22:33:26 +0000

And now you know.